5 sanity savers for introverts

(A-Z Challenge: I)

Are you an introvert an extrovert, or somewhere in between? (Not sure? Here's a great quiz.)

The best description I've come across is that extraverts recharge by being with other people, and introverts recharge best with time alone.

Speaking from the introverted end of the spectrum, it's not that introverts are awkward nerds with bad breath and social phobias. We love who we love and can really enjoy socializing. It's just that our energy meters go slowly down with social interactions until it's hard to be present and participate, because we're feeling pulled inward to recharge.

The more we understand about managing our own input, the easier things get. I highly recommend the book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain. Being introverted comes with its own superpowers. We just have to be quiet enough to access them.

Managing our need for quiet down time is harder when our day-to-day life is filled with interaction. We can't just pick up and go home whenever we feel like it. How can we stay put without getting drained?

Here are a few of my strategies. Maybe they'll help you, too.

1. Wear headphones. My workplace has an open floor plan, which is great for collaboration and brain-scrambling when I've had enough interaction. Sometimes I wear headphones with no music playing, because it helps me retreat from the talking around me and because I know that my co-workers will only come tap me on the shoulder if there's something they really need. I have to fight the urge to continually pull off the headphones to see if I'm missing good conversation, but at least that's something I'm in control of.

2. Work from home. I strive to do this about once a week and am lucky to work on a supportive team. I'm still very connected through Skype, phone, email and screen-sharing technology, but being in my own space, all by myself, I'm able to feel recharged while I stay in close communication and rock my deadlines.

3. Focus on something inanimate. I love listening to friends, and giving them the space to talk about what's on their mind. And sometimes all that talking gets overwhelming. When I notice myself slipping into the old habit of saying "uh huh" every 15 seconds while hoping they change the subject soon, I keep listening—while simultaneously noticing the way the sun is lining the branch of the tree outside the window, or taking in the rich, earthy taste of my coffee. Shifting focus to one of the other senses is a micro-break, a small reset, that allows me to continue to hold that space for the other person.

4. Come & go unapologetically. At parties, it's okay to slip into the hallway to admire the host's photos on the wall, or slip out the door for a slow walk around the block. You'd be surprised how many people don't notice. It's okay to take frequent bathroom breaks when you don't really need them. Helping clean up in the kitchen during the get-together is another way to still be participating while getting that mental break.

5. Speak up. As introverts, the people who know us best are used to our periods of silence. They don't magically know the difference between a lost-in-thought silence versus "Oh my stars, when will all this input end?" silence. So help them—they'll appreciate it. A friend told me today that he and his girlfriend tell each other they need an introvert break. And the other one gets it. I love you, and now I need to go be by myself.

Fellow members of the introvert tribe: how do you keep your zen when you're in a social environment and find yourself feeling overstimulated?